This one time, a girl that was (a little too) into me tried getting my ~romantic~ attention by putting a fruit by the foot in my mailbox with a little note on it.
That in itself wasn’t that bad.
The weird part was that she had never been to my house before, and instead of me finding it on my own, she texted me (I never gave her my number) and told me to go check the mail. I had no idea who it was or what to expect when I got there. After going out, retrieving said fruit treat and reading the note, I saw my friend the awkward turtle floating above my head.
A pause for reflection and a long sigh.
I walked back inside, shut the door and went to sleep because I did not have the energy to deal with that on a Saturday morning.
I was nineteen years old.